Bathroom Magic
by Din3113
Summary: And I said what about "Breakfast at Tiffany's?" She said, "I think I remember the film, and as I recall, I think, we both kinda liked it." And I said, "Well, that's the one thing we've got."
1. Chapter 1

Authors Note.

I think I'm a horrible writer, but oh well. I think it'd be fun to post the random things I think in my head. Most are AU. I think all are AU. Anyway. Really have no clue what the eff I'm doing. All short drabbles. I write in Ashley's POV and write her OOC because I basically just write her like she's me. Not good at Spencer's POV. Anyway, good intro. The plus side to this is, I have pretty good grammar for not ever rereading anything I write. Some stories are connected, some aren't. I'll tell ya if they are. Basically loosely related one-shots. Oh, and my weakness is starting stories. So sometimes the beginning has really not much to do with the rest of it because I write backwards.

Disclaimer: Not mine.

Chapter 1. Baby Gap, Blackberry and Bathroom Magic. (Fluffy)

_Ashley's POV_

First day of a new school year is a thing no one wants especially in the one place no one want's to be, King High, and for two reasons. The first being Madison Duarte, queen bitch herself, the second being.... who actually wants to show up at school. No one, that's who. At least that's what I thought until the first day of Junior year. It all started when my sisters huge jackass of a boyfriend ran at me full speed knocking me over...

_No ones POV _

"Watch were you're going, meathead." Ashley sneers as a hulking Aiden in a shirt obviously from the kids section at the local Gap crashes in to her, making her drop her blackberry. "Look what you did to my phone"

Aiden who either is just an idiot, or didn't see Ashley's phone squeals way to happily, "Ashley! You have to see the new girl! I mean, woah. Like, seriously."

Ashley glares at him not amused in the least bit. "Really Aiden you knocked me over the first day of school, this early, to tell me about some girl why you're supposed to be with my sister? You're such a freaking buffoon. You're lucky I don't tell Kyla."

Aiden grins and replies back, "Yeah if you tell Kyla I'll tell her about why none of her friends from last year want to come to the house anymore"

"Psh, whatev. I have no clue what you're talking about. Like she'll believe you over me. Now help me find my phone, you big dumb ogre"

Aiden ignores the insult as they both look down to find Ashley's phone. Aiden whines like a toddler, "Ashhhhhy, I can't find it anywhere."

As he says this Ashley stands up straight, brushing herself off. She starts to insult Aiden, when she see's the most beautiful, blue eyed goddess she's ever seen. As soon as she makes eye contact with the angel, she goes right into what Aiden affectionately calls her "Badass lady getting mode" and stares deeply in to the bluest eyes she's ever seen, quickly losing her swagger and getting lost in them, causing the blonde girl to blush the deepest shade of red she's ever seen and flash an amazing smile.

Right when Ashley opens her mouth to say something, Aiden stands up way to fast and interrupts the moment. Both girls immediately give him a death glare, Ashley wishing she could teleport him somewhere really cold right now. Preferably without a jacket.

"Ashhhhy, I can't find your phone and I'm late to meet Kyla can I just go"

Looking back at the blonde girl, Ashley just mumbles "Yeah, hurry, leave and don't come back. Ever."

As Aiden walks away Ashley just continues to stare at the blonde girl, nervously, not knowing what to say next.

When the goddess opens her mouth to talk, Ashley was still in her own little word. Starting to get her swagger back Ashley replies "Hrm, sorry what did you say? I was a little busy trying to find my way back to earth, after getting lost in your eyes"

The blonde beauty just blushes and looks away as a Latino girl shoves Ashley out of the way and tends to the blonde like she was hurt. "Oh Spencer, did the little dyke hurt you. Did you get the shots they gave out before school started? You know, so you don't catch the gay"

Ashley, still transfixed by the blonde somehow manages to keep Madison's idiocy from interrupting her thoughts, _"Wow, so my angel's name is Spencer. If I had my phone I'd totally get her number"_

Madison waves her hands in front of Ashley's face, snapping her out of her trance. "Hello, Ellen, quit staring at the poor girl. You're going to scare her with your perverted ways."

Ashley looks at Madison not pleased with her presence in the least bit and snaps back "At least all she can catch from me is a good time, with you who knows what she'll get." With that comeback the bell rings, seeing this as her chance Ashley quickly walks to her class forgetting all about her phone.

Later at lunch, Ashley is sitting at her usual table wondering where the hell Aiden is and staring at Spencer. The poor girl came to La La Land all the way from where ever the hell Ohio is, maybe it's part of Canada or something. As she is staring Aiden plops down beside her, and snaps her out of the twentieth trance this girl has put her in today.

"So, what happened with you and the banging new girl. You take her to the bathrooms and show her your magic tricks yet?" Aiden asks, giddy with excitement, ready to hear one of his friends many stories.

Ashley glares at him and says "Shut the hell up, Aiden, you're lucky Kyla graduated last year or she'd be pissed at you right now. Seriously, it's not like that with Spencer"

To which Aiden replies, half gushing, half singing... "Ooooo, you know her name. You like her, you want to marry her, you want to have her babies, you want to hold her hand at the movies, and go on dates with her, and meet her parents, and have sleepovers that don't involve sex."

Ashley just looks a bit distraught and tells Aiden to shut up. Aiden, sometimes actually being able to sense when his friend needs him to act like a human for once gets serious and asks "Ashley, what's wrong with you... you've been off all day"

"Nothing" Ashley says, putting her iPod headphones in. "Nothing, just leave me alone and sit with your basketball buddies today" As Aiden gets up to leave she fells some tap on her shoulder.

"Aiden, I told you to fucking leave. Cocksucker." Ashley says extremely pissed off without looking who it was. After a few seconds she fells another tap and spins around in her seat extremely fast, only to be met in an eye to bossum moment with none other then her angel, Spencer. After removing her face from between what are possibly her two new favorite things, she blushes and replies dejectedly. "What do you want?"

Spencer, sporting a matching blush of her own, mumbles back to Ashley, "Here, I think this is your phone." Before sulking back to Madison's table with the rest of the cheerwhores.

Ashley just sighs and puts her head back on the table, slipping her phone in her pocket. After sitting alone for a bit she feels her phone vibrate. She stares at the screen and it says "Spencer xoxo." Reading this, she stares over to the blonde. Who has on her face a look that Aiden would describe as a "Badass lady getting mode" face. Seeing this Ashley grins back and opens her phone, never taking her eyes off Spencer's"

"Hello, Ashley speaking, may I ask who this is?" Ashley says, wondering what Spencer is up to.

"Hiya, this is Spencer. I found your phone, and overheard you and your idiot friend talking. I was calling to ask about these magic tricks you show people in the bathroom. I was wondering if there was a waiting list, or do you preform private shows whenever. I seem to have a free hour after lunch, and found out out about this and I just love magic." Spencer says innocently, never breaking character or eye contact.

Ashley just stares back, not knowing what to say. When Spencer starts talking again, "You know what, I think I'd like the full show. Meet me in the parking lot after lunch and we'll take the rest of the day off."

To this, Ashley just drops her phone and runs towards her car, not caring about all the people staring at her. When she gets to her car she looks back at the lunch tables and notice Spencer striding over, picking up Ashley's phone on the way. When Spencer reaches Ashley's car and get's in the passenger seat Ashley just screams in her head,_ "Best first day of school ever!_" and peels out of the parking lot as fast as she can.


	2. I Drink To Get Drunk

Authors Note

Round 2 of my idiocy. Start stretching now ladies and other ladies, no gentlemen. Not my thing, dawg.

Remember that sweet story by that one person that was just a bunch of different ways Spashley could have met? That's kind of like this. Except it's not very good, and doesn't make any sense. Since this is about getting drunk, I took the liberty of getting drunk to write it. For my art. I get drunk. Spring Break in a podunk village in farmingtown, Michigan with your parents gone in Florida means all we do is get drunk and sit by fires. Americana, baby.

Chapter 2. I Drink To Get Drunk

_Random Awesome Narrator That Is In This Chapter For No Reason's POV, He's Kind Of Like A News Caster, But Awesome. Make Sure You Read This Part In A Sweet Voice._

We are coming to you live, from a drunken high school party at a random kid who's parents aren't home's house. With us now is Aiden "Gayboy" Dennison and Ashley "Rock Out With Your Cock Out" Davies, who are probably drunk! This was totally unnecessary! Me, the awesome narrator, just wanted to call Aiden a gayboy!

_Back To The Normal POV_

"Come on, Aiden! Throw the god damn ball in the cup! One more miss from you and I don't know how much longer we'll both be standing."

"Ashhhy, calm down. At least we aren't playing strip pong this time."

"We aren't? Oh shit. Who has my shirt? Fuck this game Aiden, we have to go find my shirt!" With a triumphant roar Ashley runs away from the table, leaving Gayboy to fend for himself. Stumbling across the floor she slams into a greasy looking blonde haired blue-eyed pseudoguido with the cheesiest fake tan in the room.

"Woah there beautiful, I'm used to having woman falling at my feet but damn, did you have to hit me that hard?" He slurs.

"What's your name, Pauly D? And have you seen my shirt?"

"I haven't seen your shirt girly, but I can see it on my bedroom floor if you wanna get out of here for the night. The names Carlin, Glen Carlin."

"Well Glen Carlin," Ashley purrs in his ear as she grabs his shoulders to brace herself, "Eat shit and die." She snarls right before kneeing him square in the balls.

"SPENCER! Help!" Glen squawks, now sporting a decent soprano tone to his voice.

Ashley stares off vacantly thinking out loud, "Shit! Spencer? That has to be some big dudes fucking name, it's always the big dudes with the sissy ass names. I'm gonna get my ass kicked for this!"

Then from a few feet away a young innocent looking blonde girl comes up behind Ashley and taps her on the shoulders. "Actually, I'm Spencer. But I'm still going to have to kick your ass. Sorry, have to look out for my baby brother here."

"Baby brother! How old is he like 11? Damn, he's a big 11 year old. You can't be a day older the 14, small fry. I'll take you any day, white girl."

Spencer just laughs. "I'm actually 23, this youngster here is 17 and obviously needs a ride home. Take your 3-D glasses off, drunk jackass."

"I'm wearing 3-D glasses? Just thought they got the light bulbs here changed to all blue and red and it was fucking up my eyes. Fucking Gayboy idiot." Ashley mumbles taking off her glasses. Staring at Spencer. "Wow! These must be the opposite of beer goggles because you certainly don't look 14 now. Must I say, white girl, DAYUM!"

"Quit calling me white girl! We're both white you drunk idiot! Anyway, my brother is passed out and I can't carry him. Can I just leave him here?"

Ashley, obviously staring at everything but Spencer's face mumblers absently, "Yeah, sure whatevs. Cool beans, Blue."

"Okay Drunky, I can handle Blue, but only if I can call you Yellow." Spencer says, intrigued by this younger girl.

"So Blue, I think my shirt would look best on your bedroom floor once we find it. Side note, do you think if we hooked up and you magically got pregnant like the Virgin Mary, we could name the baby Green?"

Spencer stares at the brunette and chuckles, "Sure Yellow, anything you want. I think this is going to be the start of a good friendship if your this entertaining sober"

Ashley stumbles a bit and yells at Spencer's backside as she's walking away, "Nope, I'm kinda bitchy sober! But you won't have to worry about that because I'm always drunk!"

Spencer turns around to leave and then waves behind her, "Bye Yellow!"

"See yeah Blue!" As Spencer makes it to the door Ashley yells again, "WAIT! Will I ever see you again Blue?"

Spencer laughs and says, "Only if you remember how!"

The End? I dunno, I like this one. Maybe I'll make a real ending, maybe I'll disappear forever again. WHO KNOWS? Not I, said the duck.


End file.
